Fiat
It is simple word, ‘fiat', something I really no nothing about. That kind of freedom, to simply say a total ‘yes', abandonment to such deep freedom, to hold nothing back.
Yet I hold much close to my chest, the many things that I cling to, afraid to let go, for who would I be if truly free, weightless with the saying of yes with my whole body, mind and soul?
I have no idea what that is like, ‘fiat', the simple saying of it.
Such a simple story, pointing to a deep humanity with no constraints to bind or drag under; for with freedom one truly flies into what one deeply desires. Deep humility, which in truth, is total understanding of what it means to give ones will to the Beloved, the Eternal one without reserve; no holding back.
To see without all the haze projected outwards; complexes of the drunken monkey mind,
unending circles leading to nothing but the same, over and over again,
until the mind seems to scream for some peace,
yet that ‘fiat' I have not the freedom to give,
nor do I want to, a distant dream perhaps one day realized,
but until then I am trapped with wandering in an endless desert,
tormented by the love that pursues me,
that I have not the freedom to embrace totally without reserve,
so I simply crawl over the dry sand,
seeking the oasis that eludes me, for only true freedom
allows one to enter;
the fruit of grace unearned. |
